) Oh my god I’m such an idiot. I want her so much. It feels like a bit of an ache in my diaphragm, although I hate using that word – it is exactly where the feeling is but looks so…unpoetic. But chest isn’t really specific. The feeling sort of starts below the rib-cage, in the very centre of my core, then it flows (slowly though so I don’t know if flow is a good word…maybe eases. Yeah.) and it eases up behind my lungs and into the pit of my throat. Behind that bit where your collar bones dip. In the dip of your collar bone. That’s better. And then it rises a little more to sit just behind your oesophagus. You can feel it if you press the flesh of your throat back against the ridges protecting your windpipe, about midway up your neck. Rub it around gently and that sensation is a more precise version of the feeling I have now. Running out of page now so I’ll have to use what’s left from yesterdays… WEDNESDAY (9-1.30). DAY 4. No Casey today. But then, how many times a week should a. I don't know you well enough to call you Rebecca but I hope to one day." Not unless I know your real name. How do you know I was married?"I hung my head a little. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought that up but I'm a little nervous. As to how I know? The person who sent me to see you showed me some wedding pictures." Well, sort of. I know it's kind of splitting hairs but no more so than Jimmy not being my real name. "As far as telling you my name, I don't know if I will ever be able to tell you. You'll understand why later but for now let's just say that I'm a little worried about what would happen if anyone found out who I really am." Why is that? You have something you're trying to hide?" Me, have something to hide? Like the fact that I just walked into one of your dreams? That I am sitting here talking to you in your sleep? At 3:00 in the morning. Yeah, I'm a little paranoid about who knows I can do this." Well, assuming that I believed for a second that any of this is actually.
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